Unmoored: Healing My Toxic Past
Chapter 3
Summer's POV
The second floor of the Vance Estate used to be my personal sanctuary.
On my desk sat old financial spreadsheets, but the most jarring thing was an iPad with a lit screen.
The homepage was open to the estate's security and access control system.
"That's the security schedule. You were the only one with override access," Mrs. Higgins explained softly.
Smart locks, private drivers, security guards.
A brief, terrifying flash of memory struck my brain:
It was midnight in the foyer. Julian was dragging a suitcase, trying to leave. The driver stood with his head down, refusing to start the car, while the security chief blocked the door. "If Ms. Vance doesn't give the nod, nobody leaves."
Julian had turned to look at me, his voice freezing. "Summer, don't cage yourself in here with me."
I gripped the edge of the desk, my fingertips instantly turning cold.
"Are these restrictions still active?"
"Mr. Julian said to leave them until you recovered your memory. They're temporarily suspended."
"Deactivate them permanently. Now." I grabbed the iPad and marched downstairs.
Julian was standing in the living room.
Seeing the iPad in my hand, he asked, "Did you remember something?"
"A little. It's patchy, but enough to know this thing shouldn't exist."
We walked into the security office on the first floor.
The monitors on the wall and the visitor logs on the desk showed no physical chains, but there was a digital cage. Julian Vance is restricted from leaving the estate alone. Julian Vance's itinerary must be reported. Julian Vance's vehicle dispatch requires Summer Vance's confirmation.
Julian stepped up behind me and clicked on a voice memo attached to a shift log.
A screeching voice played from the speakers. It was my voice, sounding manic and desperate:
"If you walk out that door today, I will cut off your mother's medical trust fund!"
Then came a heavy silence, followed by Julian's empty voice. "Summer, you are pathetic."
The recording cut off. My face drained of color. I couldn't even find a single word to defend myself.
"How many of these recordings are there?" I whispered.
"A lot," Julian said.
"Give them all to me."
"You won't be able to handle it."
"I have to!" I squeezed the iPad. "I can't pretend to be some magnanimous saint freeing you while ignoring just how toxic I actually was."
Julian fell silent for a few seconds before forwarding the audio files to my email.
"You used to promise you'd change back then, too. But the next day, just because you saw me take a call from someone else, you'd change the security protocols all over again."
His words pierced straight through me.
I finally understood that amnesia was not a free pass. Every single toxic debt I had forgotten was still engraved in his bones.
I turned to Mrs. Higgins. "Delete every single restriction on Julian. From now on, he goes where he wants, meets who he wants, and takes any car he wants. No approvals needed."
The butler hesitated, looking at Julian.
"Do as she says," Julian said quietly.
Watching the red restriction icons on the screen turn gray, Julian suddenly asked, "Are you in such a rush to destroy these because you're afraid of remembering, or because you're afraid I'll see you regret it?"
"Both," I said, turning to face him. "But mostly, I'm terrified of keeping you in this cage."
I had the security admin print out a log of the changes. I signed it, made Mrs. Higgins sign as a witness, and then handed it to Julian.
Julian looked at the paper, finding it absurd. "You're keeping a paper trail for this?"
"Yes. In the past, I acted on pure emotion. I gave you freedom when I was happy and took it away when I wasn't. Now, I'm binding myself in black and white."
Julian took the pen, hesitating for a long moment.
Finally, he signed his name in the witness column.
When he set the pen down, his voice was quiet enough to make my chest ache.
"Summer, you better mean it this time."
I stared at his signature. "I hope I do. If I don't, you can use this paper to sue me."